I can’t believe the day is here. Today. My time in Israel is dwindling, the countdown is at 18 days and I can’t wait to go home. You probably just did a double take. Home? She wants to go home? I thought Israel was her home, her homeland, where her people reside and have resided for thousands of years. This brings me to a somewhat sensitive topic, especially since I’m writing for a Jewish site: I don’t want to make aliyah.

Before we get too hasty, let me make a few things clear. I. Love. Israel. I do and always have. Being on this program has, in the end, only increased my love for this special, unique, wonderful country. Its people, who at times can be the sweetest and most welcoming people you’ve ever met, but also at times have no problem cutting you in line or being reckless on the roads; the land, which is so diverse in climate and terrain; and its spiritual significance, which derives itself from the Tanach, but makes itself known through the constant devotion people willingly and gladly give. I love all of this and always will. However, I do not want to live here, at least within my immediate future.

The knowledge I acquired in Israel is vast, and my experiences are so important to the person I am still becoming. I now know how to use public transportation successfully (unlike in my hometown in the U.S.), converse (almost fluently) in a different language and have made friends that I’m excited to see again in the States. I’ve had an opportunity to spend nine months without my parents and have had ample room to grow and mature.

I think that Israel, for me, is not necessarily a destination point, but a crucial stop along the road to getting there. It is the rest stop that has gotten me refueled and energized, and has made me a better driver. Without Israel, I don’t think I would be nearly as prepared as I am now to face my future.

You might argue that I make it sound like I could have had my year away in any country and gotten the same results. I do not think this is accurate. I think the fact that I spent this year in Israel, with hundreds of other Jewish teens in a place that is so important to my religion and to my existence, is most of what made this year such a success. My relationships were stronger, my purpose was stronger, my nine months were stronger.

But I am ready for summer. I am ready (if not a bit anxious) for college. I miss my family, my friends, my bed, my dog, my favorite foods and my house. But as much as I miss these things, I think I will miss crazy drivers, Jewish hospitality, public transportation and the general sense of being welcomed wherever I go just as much, if not more (OK, maybe not the crazy drivers so much).

Israel will always call to me as an option, but not all options are meant to be taken. Some exist to offer comfort, reassurance and just “if anything goes terribly wrong in your life you still have this” feeling. Israel will always be there, and I’ll always be considering. 

Genna Morton, 17 years old, is from Roslyn Heights, N.Y., and is attending Washington University in St. Louis next year. She loves downloading even more music to her iPod and kicking back with a good book.